Guilt is a formidable opponent. So many revolve a lot of their lives around feeling guilty. It’s a learned behavior that literally becomes a habit. A spiders web of toxic thoughts. I see it with my clients all the time and often it becomes clear that the root of many issues stem back to guilt, shame and fear. Guilt is WAY up there. We need to come up with what I call ‘guilt busters.’
When I break it down with them and ask them: ‘what is it you’re guilty for and what have you actually done wrong?” normally they really can’t answer that question. It’s an inner turmoil and feeling that they SHOULD or SHOULD NOT have done something. However they haven’t actually done anything to be guilty about. It’s deep within the belief system often lying dormant for years but gaining power. Fiction and not reality. I see it often from those who grew with confusing and conflicting religious messages as well as parents who battled addiction of one sort or another.
All too often we live in the shadows of others belief systems. Whether it be our parents, teachers, figures of authority. We take on their beliefs at a young age before we’ve had time to think it through and form our own. It becomes what we consider the truth, deeply ingrained within whether it is or it isn’t. The habit is formed.
Of course there are times we have done things wrong. We need to own that, learn to forgive ourselves and do better. However, wallowing and swimming around in that guilt does a real number on our heads and bodies. It truly is very destructive.
Ultimately most guilt and feelings of anxiety come from the words we actually say to ourselves and the pictures we’re making in our heads. Sometimes we’ll even come up with elaborate stories that have little truth but we almost train ourselves to believe them. Reality is perception and perception is reality.
It’s so easy to feel lost and powerless but we actually do have the power to control better pictures and words, not just sometimes but the majority of the time. We’re already doing it without realizing it. We’re constantly putting images in our minds. The negative self chatter can be deafening. The truth is our minds don’t know, or care if what we tell it is right or wrong true or false helpful or unhelpful, it just absorbs it and allows it in. The gate keeper.
The most productive thing we can do is to give our minds much better descriptive and positive words, pictures too. Cut the cord of unnecessary guilt when you’ve not even done anything wrong. Don’t allow other people’s expectations to become your own. Be true to yourself, authentic and you’ll find you’ll know when you actually need to work on something and when you’re actually doing just fine. And if you do, let it be with clarity, calmness and focus.
Our minds job is to act on the pictures, information and words we give it. It’s doing its job so we have to do our job and give much more constructive and accurate instructions all the time. Think of constant feelings of guilt as a form of anxiety and low self worth. It starts to make more sense then that we are literally wasting our energy in engaging in the negativity of ‘assumed’ wrong doing. We’re ultimately only responsible for our own actions and happiness, we have no control on how others feel. Of course we must take responsibility for being good human beings but allow our imperfections to be our teaching guides and not an avenue for self punishment.
This is how Hypnosis helps so much for releasing unnecessary feelings of guilt, anxiety and stress. Become aware of your negative self talk and literally stop it. When you can rewire your brain and let go of past experiences that were associated with that negativity you’ll find that will empower and shift your thinking. If you can do this daily, you’ll literally see huge changes in the way that you think and feel. Remember the mind will lead and the body will follow. They work together, they’re teammates.
I’ll leave you with this wonderful technique called ‘Havening’ which is so excellent for releasing feelings of guilt, anxiety and trauma. Very simple but consistency and practice is the key. You can just follow along with world renowned Paul Mckenna here. If you were to work with me I would be doing this with you personally. Let’s Guilt Bust.
Here’s a great link for further reading on the negative loops of often unnecessary and toxic guilt.
To Your Success.
Be confident and stay humble.
Vanessa Lindgren, Cht
© 2020 Modern Hypnosis Works